By: Rachel Carrera, Director of Marketing and Community Relations
The delicate flowers adhered to the wall
Seem to wilt as the wallpaper peels;
As I watch their paper lives ebb away,
I can’t help but know how that feels.
I was handed my diagnosis after
So many tests that I couldn’t refute it,
It felt like a life sentence was passed on to me
Sealing my fate, and I couldn’t commute it.
Even as I watched vial after vial after vial
Of crimson liquid being drawn from my arm,
I held onto the hope – nay, the knowledge, belief –
That there was no cause for alarm.
But then came the day after numerous tests
The doctor told me I have lupus;
I knew my life would be forever changed,
And wondered just how I’d get through this.
With my hair falling out, the inflammation and pain,
And every ounce of my energy taken,
I couldn’t handle another thing!
I never felt more lost and Godforsaken.
“Why’d You do this to me?” I cried to the Lord,
“Haven’t I been through enough?”
“Trust me, my child,” He whispered in my ear,
“I’ll be with you when life gets more tough.”
“What do You mean when it ‘gets more tough,’” I asked;
“I’ve already seen much adversity.”
Then God told me, “Child, I’ve shown you bad times
So that you could appreciate my mercy.”
So I looked back on my life, and I thanked God right then
For all He had sacrificed to save me;
And I promised to always praise His holy name
Even when my lupus enslaved me.
Since then, I’ve remained in a state of constant flare,
Nearly each day’s brought physical pain;
But the few random good days have delivered me hope
And a promise that it won’t always rain.
So I look toward the sun and hope it shines on my face,
And I pray that the storm will soon taper;
And I reflect on the good times and forget all the bad
In this delicate life made of paper.
This poem was in response to Dean Burnetti Law’s staff poetry challenge to celebrate National Poetry Month.